Is there such a thing as a healthy protein bar?

55% of our calories now come from ultra-processed foods (UPFs).

When I bring this up, I often hear, “Not me. I don’t eat candy, chips, or sugary cereal!” But UPFs don’t always look like junk. They hide behind “healthy” labels (flavored yogurt, veggie chips, granola bars). And few disguise themselves better than the protein bar.

As a busy mom, I totally understand the pull. Shelf-stable snacks make the week survivable. But here’s the problem: kids and adults are getting a significant chunk of their daily calories from what are essentially edible science experiments. UPFs have been directly linked to higher cancer risk, earlier death, and worse mental health outcomes (British Medical Journal, 2024).

So the big question is:

Can you find a bar that actually supports protein goals, doesn’t spike blood sugar, and is safe for the whole family?

Let’s investigate.

🤓 What to know: Most “health” bars will spike your blood sugar and stress your gut microbiome.

When I was growing up in the '80s and '90s, your options were: granola bars, PowerBars, or candy bars. Then came the 2000s—hello bar explosion. Now we’ve got entire aisles of so-called “smart” snacks. But just because something brags about protein doesn’t mean it’s a smart choice.

Here’s why most bars fail my test:

💣 Sugar Bombs in Disguise

Even the most innocent-looking bars often pack 12–20g of added sugar.

• Example: A Clif Bar contains 16g of added sugar—more than half the recommended daily limit.
  

• Sneaky sweeteners like sucralose and acesulfame potassium (hello, “low carb” claims) may disrupt the gut microbiome and interfere with glucose metabolism.

🐮 Protein at Any Cost

Most bars use cheap whey protein from industrial dairy, often sourced from cows treated with hormones, antibiotics, and fed pesticide-laced feed.

• Quality matters: The most bioavailable protein still comes from animal muscle, not isolated powders.
  

• Plus, your body can only use ~20–30g of protein at once for muscle synthesis. More than that = no extra gain, but potential kidney strain and digestive discomfort.

🌱 Missing the Fiber

Fiber is essential for heart health, blood sugar stability, and hormone regulation. Yet most bars are fiber-poor.

• Even those with oats or nuts often have <3g of fiber, which doesn’t cut it. You want 4g+ per snack if possible.

☠️ Franken-Ingredients

• Emulsifiers like mono/diglycerides and carrageenan are linked to gut inflammation and possible cancer risk (PLOS Medicine, 2024).
  

• Novel fat substitutes like EPG (used in David Bars) are not fully digested, not long-term studied, and may affect nutrient absorption, microbiome composition, and cardiovascular markers.

💪 What to do: Look for bars with non-dairy protein, less than 10g of sugar, and gluten-free organic ingredients.

Bars can absolutely be part of a smart routine, but they should be a bridge snack, not a meal replacement. 

Also: they’re not immune to context—what works for a post-workout teen might not work for a perimenopausal mom.

When evaluating a bar, I look for:

✅ Under 10g of sugar (Check serving size: some bars are multiple servings.)

✅ Well-sourced protein (Animal, egg, or plant-based protein + leucine.) 

✅ Organic or grass-fed ingredients

✅ 4+ grams of fiber

✅ Gluten-free (To support gut health and reduce inflammation and bloating.)

3 bars I actually recommend

After vetting dozens, here are three that pass my test (with caveats):

🥩 EPIC Wagyu Beef Snack Strips

• 6g of clean, animal-based protein

• Only 2g of sugar

• Whole ingredients, gluten-free

• Caveat: Not enough protein for a full snack on its own—I usually eat two.

🥜 Big Spoon Roasters Peanut Butter Bars

• 11g of plant-based protein

• No refined sugar, 4g fiber, gluten-free, organic, filling

• Caveat: Peanuts are low in lysine, so they’re not considered a complete protein. Better as a filling, low-sugar snack than a muscle-builder.

🌿 Immortal Vegan Protein Bars

• 15g plant-based protein

• Organic, gluten-free, whole food ingredients

• Caveat: Uses pea protein, which isn’t naturally a complete protein unless enhanced with other aminos. Good for gut health; not ideal post-lift.

🐮 Jacob Beef Tallow Protein Bar

• 20g complete grass-fed whey protein

• 9g prebiotic fiber

• Sweetened with honey; no sugar alcohols

• Caveat: If you tolerate dairy, a clean whey-based bar can be great. If you’re sensitive to dairy proteins, these can trigger inflammation, bloating, or skin issues.

Got one you love that I didn’t list? Reply and tell me. I’m all ears!

⚡️ Quick hits

🍟 French fries & diabetes

A new Harvard study tracking 200,000 for 30 years found that eating french fries 3x per week is linked to a 20% higher risk of type 2 diabetes. French fries (though delicious) are metabolic kryptonite thanks to refined flour coatings and inflammatory seed oils. 

Bake sweet potatoes or russets with EVOO and sea salt. This handy fry-cutting gadget makes it simple.

🍷 Glutathione & alcohol

When you drink alcohol, your liver uses up glutathione, the body’s master antioxidant, to detoxify it. To support recovery after a night out, supplement with NAC (N-acetyl cysteine), a key glutathione precursor.

I like this one (which also has Zinc and Vitamin C) to keep antioxidant levels up and inflammation down. 

🩸Safe cycle tracking

Safety concerns over period app data are in the news again. I use two highly-vetted wearables Whoop (helps you sync your workouts to your cycle) and Oura (just launched perimenopause features) without fear of my data being shared. 

For a non-wearable tracker, I like Stardust—it’s beautiful, engaging and committed to privacy. 

💛 The Momgevity Files

Late Friday afternoon, after a very long work week—three-day executive offsite, multiple team dinners, late nights, plus solo parenting while my husband traveled—I hit a wall.

Let’s be honest: all I wanted was to crawl under a blanket and watch The Lion Guard with my 5- and 3-year-olds.

But instead, I logged onto a 45-minute Zoom Pilates class with weights. Why? Because, also being honest, I hadn’t worked out since the previous Sunday.

The core work and goblet squats left me feeling calmer, clearer, and more energized. (Duh, you might say.) But wow, it’s hard for me to fit in exercise right now.

That’s a problem, because the research is beyond clear: movement—especially weight training, Zone 2 cardio, and HIIT—is the closest thing we’ve got to a longevity superpower. You can take all the peptides, eat all the protein, and track your bloodwork religiously. But nothing replaces exercise. Nothing even comes close.

Instead of spiraling into guilt or self-judgment, I told myself what I tell my patients (and what Buddhist teachers have been saying for centuries about the path to enlightenment):

Begin again.

Or in the words of Dr. Oz (my old boss—that’s a story for another day) who blew my overachiever A-student mind in 2006 by saying:

“Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.”

On Saturday, I got in the infrared sauna (shown to mimic some of the cardiovascular benefits of exercise).

On Sunday, I went to yoga and cleared the cobwebs from my fascia after a sluggish week.

On Monday, I did Rocamoons’ 25-minute HIIT class (one of my faves, who I discovered via her IG recs).

And today? I probably won’t exercise. My husband’s still away. There are the usual demands of work, kids, life, etc. But I’ll track my steps and be grateful that in NYC, the subway does give something back: a reliable way to hit 7,000+ steps a day. (Even if the sweat and smells rob my soul.)

I’ll remind myself it’s all OK. Because I’ll begin again.

Stay strong, stay curious, and breathe, 

Robin

As always, this newsletter is for informational and educational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any health decisions or changes to your treatment plan.